I started this blog three times within an hour and then stepped away for a few hours. I can’t seem to find the words to share my heart with you today, but I’m going to try.

I’ve found myself in a weird place. My feelings are a bit jumbled. Today is my second lungaversary, and I thought I would want to celebrate. But instead, I’ve spent most of my day reflecting.

My gratitude is so deep that it often brings me to tears. The most precious gift was given to me by a complete stranger and their family. As this family had to let their loved one go, I was granted more time with mine. There are no words for what their generosity means to me. I pray that I’ll have the opportunity to share my appreciation with them in person one day. However, if that day never comes, I’ll continue to pray for them.

In addition to expressing my thanks, I long to learn more about this person whose lungs I now carry—the lungs that maintain me from day to day, breath to breath. I have so many questions about them. The fact is that unless God chooses for me to know, I must find contentment with the unknown.

I praise the Lord for allowing me to live. Although I know heaven will be a glorious place and the world isn’t as glamorous as we’d like it to be, staying here to see my family grow, witness their achievements, and love them more is what I want most right now.

I also want to continue telling others about the goodness of God and the gift of salvation given to us by Jesus. Having gone through a near-death experience. I feel an urgency to share the gospel like I never have before.

Yet even amid my praise, I question why I’m dealing with chronic rejection. I know there is a lesson, a purpose, and a plan. And again, unless God reveals more to me, I must somehow find contentment.

So, maybe the real purpose of this blog today is to remind me to be content in the unknown. To live life to the fullest, even as I face adversity and don’t know the outcome.

Everyone faces the unknown each day. We have our plans, and we strive to reach our goals daily. But we’re not guaranteed another breath. No one knows what challenges and changes are waiting just around the corner. So are we going to choose to embrace them or give up because of them?

It is our choice! One we have to make daily. Sometimes hourly.

Listen, the enemy wants to defeat us. He wants to hold us back from being all we can be. The moment we start to become effective for the Lord’s kingdom, Satan gets busy. He will hold us back with our doubts and worries. He’ll tell us God is punishing us, not growing us. He’ll want us to believe our trials and tribulations are happening to us, not for us, and ultimately God’s glory.

That’s simply not true. Jesus loves us so much that He gave His life for us on a cross. How can we ever doubt He wants the best for us?

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life and have it to the full.

John 10:10

If you take only one thing from my blog today, let it be this. God loves you and has great plans for you. Step into your calling. And when you find yourself without answers, find contentment in the unknown.

As I bundle up my thoughts and feelings about today, I pray the Lord will use me to further His Kingdom. I thank Him for the gift of life and the family who gave that gift to me.

I give glory to Him for each of you. You have supported me through your prayers and kind words. For that, I’m forever grateful.

And finally, I know my God is working so I can be content with the unknown.

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